A hearty End Game standing ovation goes to former British Medical Journal editor Richard Smith for bringing incredible personal flair to that most mundane of communiques – the “out of office” email.

Here’s what a recent automated response said:

“Gone to Chicago that city of hammers, meat, graft, bull, and pork to make a film on evidence based medicine, roast an old friend (with all the trimmings), cogitate on peer review, swim in the lake, look at the Caillebotte’s, and listen to the blues. Am way behind with emails, so if you haven’t had an answer it’s not that I can’t be bothered with you—although it might be. Love Richardxxx”

Richard, we treasure those kisses, and we want your life.