'Traffic? If said reader is disturbed by the traffic in Lancaster they had better never come to HSJ towers, where it frequently feels like we are perched on the edge of the M1'
My dear readers, I have been touched by the levels of interest you've shown in my dip into the world of cycling. A generous handful of you have proclaimed 'wheel, wheel!' to my enquiries as to whether or not I should in fact take up the spoke.
'Go for it!' declared one.
'You could have had a 50p premium phone-in on this one,' said another; dammit, why did I not think of that?
'Yes go for it and write your column on the experience to encourage others in the same predicament as you,' wrote another reader.
On a less kind note a colleague told me to pull myself together: 'The ridicule of a few small children is nothing compared with the loud cheer I got from hundreds of football fans when I fell off my bike - breaking my collarbone - on a mini roundabout outside Arsenal's ground on a match day. Now that's embarrassment. Fortunately there were lots of police around to help.'
The only dissenting tone in fact came from a Lancaster-based reader.
'Despite all the hype about the health value of riding a bike I personally think its madness with the amount of traffic on the roads these days - and it isn't even law to wear a crash helmet - it's sheer madness,' they wrote.
Traffic? If said reader is disturbed by the traffic in Lancaster they had better never come to HSJ towers, where it frequently feels like we are perched on the edge of the M1.
He goes on: 'If I were you I'd buy an exercise bike or invest in some rollers that you can set up in the garden to put your bicycle on, pedal as slow or fast as you like, and go precisely nowhere but still get all the health benefits while watching TV through the window.'
A tempting thought but there are drawbacks. I'm not sure the living room is big enough to accommodate an exercise bike without irritating the other half (I'd be blocking the darts on TV).
Also the garden is at the back of the house and the TV in a room at the front. Sitting in our postage stamp of a front garden would only increase the risks of ridicule.
Anyway, I think I have made up my mind to try and learn the ways of the wheel; as much because I want a bike with a basket on it as anything else. All I have to do know if find the time to take the lessons.