Published: 14/07/2005, Volume II5, No. 115 Page 43
Martha is assistant director of modernisation at a primary care trust.
At the end of a busy week, she collapses in front of her PC to e-mail Mary, a former colleague, who has escaped Down Under
Groan! Just about managed to get into the right position to type this. Which means two pillows under my bruised bum and another one to prop up my injured back. I only just got out of the Outward Bound weekend alive.
To be honest, we were not quite as fit as we thought we were. And the person most over-confident about their superhuman fitness levels was the mighty Rog, our much-loved head of modernisation. I think he thought he could have enrolled on the British Space Programme, run the London Marathon, won the Tour de France and still have had some energy spare to shimmy into some serious salsa moves with his improbably gorgeous girlfriend, Helga.
That was before he got stuck halfway up a rope ladder, too exhausted to climb any higher and too petrified to climb down. He had to be rescued by a huge, muscle-bound squaddie. Rog looked just like a little ginger puppet as this hunky hero carried him down, tucked under his arm.
'do not know what this is doing for our collective team spirit, but It is doing wonders for my morale, ' said his deputy Jenny as we watched little Rog struggle to his feet, trying to look nonchalant.
'Funny how your perspective on someone changes once You have seen them totally screw something up.' I said. 'So humanising.' But we spoke too soon - within the next 24 hours Jenny had sprained her ankle and I had done something horrible to my back - while I was picking up a pair of tights.
Now I have two modes: lying on my front and groaning, or being propped up in front of the TV, groaning even more.
(The bottom injury happened when I fell out of bed. ) Now, hippy dippy Trudy, our head of communications, has come to my rescue. 'See Kevin, ' she said, giving me a little green business card. 'He's my osteopath - a real sweetie. He'll soon have you back to normal.' Normal? In the meantime I find munching chocolate Bourbons does me no end of good - that and remembering how daft Rog looked.
Next week: What's a learning point?