Forget about pay restraint, referral management and primary care prescribing, there’s a new show in QIPP town apparently – bath salts.

Reports have reached End Game, via fashion and beauty bible Cosmopolitan, that these “age old health boosters” could also save the NHS £14.5 billion annually.

Yes, just under a seventh of the entire NHS budget is currently being squandered on treating conditions such as arthritis, rheumatism and psoriasis when it turns out all sufferers ever really needed is a long hot soak.

Gwyneth Paltrow and Liv Tyler swear by them, apparently, and they have a combined age of 432.

Cosmo has been reliably informed, by Westlab, who make said salts, that they can also prevent dry coughs, sore throats, digestive disorders and muscle cramps. And, it seems, the NHS’s financial ills.

Who said there was no silver bullet to the NHS’s funding crisis? End Game will not listen to any more whining from trusts about the marginal tariff until they’re dunking all emergency admissions in this magical elixir.